Sunday, July 27, 2008
I loathe horrible English, especially on MSN, nowadays. I'm fine with people speaking in the vernacular. But its those sentence structures like, "You got fever?" that really get on my nerves. Or they make a point to end every sentence with Hor. And Siaaa. Its alright to throw a few natural Singlish words in, but its a whole new other thing to purposely make an effort to speak in Singlish. To me, Singlish should be a matter of convenience and not a whole culture on its own. That's when it begins to get grating. Its living proof of how some Singaporeans fail all 10 odd years of English education. Hence, from now on I'll try my best to type as properly as I can.
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
12:55 PM
# # # Friday, July 25, 2008
47 questions for discrete math *inserts omg emoticon*
gsi: americans play too much. people from other coutnries study all the time ( i can attest to that)! back when i was in college (armenia) we kept asking the professors for more homework!
student: don't they have tvs in armenia?
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
1:52 PM
# # #
I <3 berkeley so much I don't want to return to Mich. Cos here I feel more welcomed and less alienated. For the past year I've been wondering why is it so hard to mix with the americans. Must I alienate the Singaporeans in order to mix with the Americans? Must I adapt an American accent, abandon all other culture and adapt their culture, party, and follow the flow to mix with them. Or be cockish and boisterous to be accepted.
But here its so much easier. Its so much easier to be myself, just speak properly (i.e. don't rush, no singlish, but no need to speak in their accent) and yet still be accepted. In the past 3 days I've met a succession of people from different cultures who I can hold a proper conversation with - i..e not awkward small talk, and feel accepted and not like the wierd alien. I don't know how to describe the feeling. In Singapore growing up being myself is something tht I've been taking for granted until I went to Ann Arbor. Then when I went back to Singapore I felt so comfortable yet again.
This morning the south korean (I think) beside me was so nice and I felt myself. And then I met a Chinese later and I felt like I hit it off well with him. I know how good the conversation went cos I could feel neither of us wanted to end it. After that in the library I met another classmate and tht was another not awkward conversation. And then I met a Singaporean in my class. And again on the way home. Maybe this sounds very routine, but its so not. Its so extremeley surprising to me and put me in good spirits for the rest of the day. Cos it debunks what I've believed for the past year - that I'm socially awkward and lost all my social skills and livlieness, that I must look like one of those people tht no one wants to be freinds with. In the past few wks, I've been able to smile and laugh naturally again, unlike the forced ones for the past year.
Yesterday I went for consultation with my Math55 teacher and met another caucasian girl. Consultation led to a conversation and I've never talked like tht to a teacher since jc whilst talking to mrs yeo or mrtan. And then as I left with the girl and we made conversation the conversation went so smoothly. THEN I met her roommate and it wasn't awkward at all.
I know this must sound damn trivial and all, but its not. Just one of these events a day can put me in good moods for the rest of the day.
It's a fact tht Mich is defintiely mroe closed up then California. With such an influx of immigrants and culture, people hre are defeintily bound to be more informed and more sophisticated. Not to mention its right beside a global city. A proper one - SF. And most of them are from LA anyway. I;ve had it with those "HOW DID YOU SPEAK ENGLISH SO WELL" questions in Mich, where the people are so much more american centric. I suppose another reason could be the party culture in Mich. I think I've proven myself time and again I can't fit in that party culture. And I do see more geeks in berkeley. Hehe.
And I;m not being biased. I swear, the difference in culture may be subtle but noticeable, and it does make a big difference.
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
11:59 AM
# # # Thursday, July 24, 2008
refusetoworkrefusetoworkrefusetoworkREFUSEEEE.
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
1:14 PM
# # # Wednesday, July 23, 2008
What's wrong with the whole world of guys. Some are just so desperate to prove how grown up and matured they are, be it by forcing themselves to do what they can't disregarding the fact that they are putting people in danger, or maybe by pretending to enjoy seemingly adult substances and materials. All I can say is tht I have nothing but detest, annoyance, and despise. I don't know what point you're trying to prove, but in the end they are not anymore successful then before (not that they are anyway, I'm just trying to avoid using negative words here), not any better then before, not any more attractive or desirable then before. In fact, you've merely taken a few step backwards which I thought was already impossible given the previous position. It just comes across as superficial and poser. In fact, a cmi one at tht. For gods sake everyone is at least 19. I'd expect maybe a bit more maturity and level headedness but some people just act like children, failing all the previous 10 odd years of elite education. I can ignore all these observations and go about my own way, but for one, the despise its incurring in me is too great, and another, I think its sad and perhaps a little disappointing how people degrade to
this level and for their own good, perhaps wish that they would realise and pull themselves out.
Chances are if I talked to u recently on msn, and you don't do stupid things like nudging me, i'm not talking about you. On another hand, I;m damn amused by the pokemon application. Thanks Jeffrey haha, it brightened up my whole evening.
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
5:14 PM
# # # Tuesday, July 22, 2008
Phew. its over and it went quite well. Now I swear nvr to play hp poker in class again (even though i know i will starting tmr.)
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
5:32 AM
# # # Monday, July 21, 2008
Omg, when this %&^ exam is over i have so much I plan to do. Swim, sleep, talk on the phone for long hours, watch tudou. I sorta took the time I have for granted for quite some time, since end of April. Haven't chionged or study for a long time.
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
6:04 PM
# # # Sunday, July 20, 2008
I'm never going to have stranger Singaporeans live with me in my house next time. As rongsiu and i heard our tenent crying and arguing with her bf earlier tonight, as typical Singaporeans go...
- i started feeding info from what I eavesdrop from the living room to her in the bedroom thru msn
- log onto facebook and stalk her and her bf
- start discussing her choice of haircuts and comparing then and now thru old photos
- link to her blog from her facebook and dig more info
of course all these are done without malicious intent. just tht singaporeans have this innate kaypoh-ness that manifests itself when appropriate, and technology offers her helping hand in the form of facebook and blogs.
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
7:30 PM
# # # Saturday, July 19, 2008
Recounting a rather luan lesson on Wed, as my armenian teacher was trying to explain fibonacci numbers with a story.
f0 = 1
f1 = 1
f2 = 2
f3 = 3 e.t.c.
"So assuming there's a robin on a tree in Year 0. And robins don't die. they jsut multiply. And somehow, in the next year, it gives rise to another robin...."
"HUH"
"Oh wait...I've got it wrong. That doesn't work."
Another student: I think you should use bunnies instead. Bunnies work better
"Hmm..*thinks*"
Another student: HEY you know the problem? The problem is tht it shouldn't be in years, it should be in months! Bunnies don't live so long"
" NONO waitwait, there was a bunny in year 0, and another bunny in year 1. and they give birht to a bunny each in year 2..."
Yet another student: We shouldn't be doing bunnies dying or living. It should be matured and immatured bunnies.
henceforth was such a mix of voices and rubbish opinions hehehe
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
6:21 AM
# # # Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Was rereading my oldoldold blogposts with wenjie one night. Omg I came to the stunning realisation that I blog like an ahlian (which wenjie agreed without hesitation). No kidding. With all the purpose mispelling of words. And the lingo back in the early 2000s amuse me. For eg, it was very liu xing to end every sentence with a "can": "I'M SO ANGRY CAN." Haha. Then there was this act emo period cos everyone else around me was emo. And there was the do alot of quizzes period. Hahahahaha, read through some of the results: "You are a transexual barbie" "You eat people" and what not. But of course those were veryvery good times to rmb. Omg half the stuff I used to do with waisze and gel I've forgotten. Stupid stuff we do like, um, playing badminton without the racket and shuttlecock or crashing mrssim's chinese class which I rmb was a hilarious affair.
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
11:29 AM
# # # Saturday, July 12, 2008
Last night was bloody surreal. First there was the rally. Then there was all the business with jctalks. And while this was going on there was a blackout. BLACKOUT. Really. To quote rongsiu: " I thought only nepal has blackouts" You'd think I'd learn from nepal and bring flashlights whereever I go, but blame it on my assumption that as the world's epitome of
developed first world country, there wouldn't be blackouts in the middle of summer.
Anyway I was all prepared to stay up the night studying discrete math afterthe assurance from my instructor tht it's not going to be all easy or normal. As Murphy's law goes, at 2.30 am when I have finished neither studying nor my homework, the aforementioned blackout occured. I got into frantic mode.
Tina: Luckily we all have laptop batteries.
Noo, not so lucky. The last time my laptop ran out of battery I just removed it. Then she offered me all her electronics to use as light. Laptop, handphone, what not. But I guess its not o ofeasible. Rongsiu called Brian who offered his living room where there's light and internet, then Tina offered to drive me...until she realsied that without electricity the gate can;t open. So Brian came out and walked me to his place. THANKS SO MUCH!
...and chatted with bec and liangcheng and ket in the midst of studying franticaly for the darn test. surprisingly, bec is remarkably astute and surprisingly deep and mature. SURPRISINGLY. And liangcheng brings out the lameness in me. HAHA.
So spent the night in Brian's living room and went for class without much sleep. Test went ok lah, i suppose. And I'm surprisingly not tired now. I'll go for some retail therapy, den settle tht jc talks business. sian.
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
1:18 AM
# # # Tuesday, July 08, 2008
Everytime I open my email inbox a feeling of dread comes over me. First the number of new emails registers. Then as I open each one the feeling of responsibility grows larger and larger, and more burdensome. Slowly, I'll read each one to procrastinate replying them. After I'm done, I realise I have to reply them, collate the information, and I procrastinate this for tonight. After that, I then realise who hasn't replied but should have replied and what implications these mean. Also, it tells me what more emails I have to send out. I'll procrastinate all these for tonight, telling myself after all, its 4 am in Singapore and no one will be replying and reading emails. I'll then hurry back to do proper homework, but my mood is spoilt alreay by this stupid burden on my shoulders for the rest of the day.
Am I learning? No.
Am I developing? No.
Am I growing? No.
-.-
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
7:00 AM
# # # Sunday, July 06, 2008
Ok, so another attempt at procrastination. Went to San Fran on Wed with Sharon cos it was free on the first Wed of the month. Took a bus down and I <3<3<3 Sanfran! Its a proper city, for one. Living in Singapore made me take propercities for granted. In states, there are places like, San Jose, which I went to last week. Or even Detroit, which they call a city, but its not really REALLY a city. No skyscrapers, extremeley quiet, no bustle, no globalised feel about it. Ahh, but SANFRAN there was. Slyscrapers, shops from all over the world, diverse people. And what's good about it, the crowd is not as zha as say, NY, or Chicago. It looks cleaner and brighter.
Also, it has a certain character to it. Its built on slopes for one, so either way, if u stand on the higher end and look down the streets to the city below, its beautiful. Or, if you stand at the bottom of the hill and look up the hill at the streets above, its awesome. And the houses have a spanish style to it. Also, its near the bay, so there are pretty sites of yachts, piers, whitewashed houses e.t.c. Exacrlty like how its portrayed in DisneyLand.
So we went to the Exploratarium, which is kinda like our Sc Center. Then to the golden gate bridge, which was pretty pretty. After which, we went down to Chinatown and bought stuff! AND i must say the Chinatown in SanFran is world class! It doesn't look as dangerous as NYC, there;'s like, an eclectic mix of things, from sauces, to all the groceries, to japanese or Indonesian biscuits ( i bought Durian Waffles), to dim sum, its realy like being in Asia again. What's more, the price kinda matches the goods. Like i bought po lo bao for 35 c a piece?
So...that's sanfran!!
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
12:38 AM
# # # Friday, July 04, 2008
Went to SanFran yest and it was greatgreatgreat!!!
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
4:17 AM
# # # Wednesday, July 02, 2008
oh i forgot..and kingdom hearts is AWAITING!!!!!
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
3:53 PM
# # #
*drums fingers on table* Hmm..
Ladida. Berkeley is nice so far. Went to Stanford, Jelly Belly Factory, San Jose last Sat. Weather aside, things are going rather swimmingly. School is rather confusing. I think its time to leave those intro classes behind and enter the realm of higher level classes where I need to put in effort. Finally. =S.
Also, I swear this is the last time I'm organizing something. Last year I was...*ahem* young and naiive. I saw my procrastination and irresponsibility as flaws I feel that I can correct by joining alot of these organization stuff to try to make myself more matured. Um, I think I feel that its causing me alot more pain and torture then its worth and I'll stop putting everyone else at risk of having a horrible event. This JC talks thing is causing me so much anguish. Its not even hard to organise, the people are responsible and responsive and enthusiastic, and there's no publicity or budgetting or the likes involved, which is the kind I like. BUT organisation is just not for me. I don't have the far sight. Or rather I do have the far sight but I don't like to use it. Causes too much brain cells and thinking and the process is causing me alot of adrenaline =SSSSS I was just happily (and unthinkingly) followig the current into this post without thinking too much. Sheesh. The lack of foresight brought me here to begin with. SEE?! Its so NOT for me. AHHHHH.
Next on my agenda is a dedication to Ofe, who probbaly ca't see this. She can't reply my emails either. And I can't call her. And my internet was so screwed I can't sms her either (so i'm banking on KET to relay this to her!) Tell her I'm thinking of her and I'm sorry I couldn't see her through her studying period BUT I'll be there in spirit and I sincrely wish her all the best! And to ejoy herself to the fullest once this period is DONE. And that everytime I think of the lovely lovely note she sent me I feel damn warm and fuzzy all over (thanks ket, i love you too, as much as i love ofe =D <3)
And finally is a dedication to my favourite guy: Wenjie!!!! Whose emails are keeping me sane as I struggle with all the stooopid contradictions and logic homework (give by an gsi, who swore he'd only give so much homework for the first chapter. yeah right) AND for being so supportive all the time. Wheeee *hugs
...AND I want to complain about guys. Well, other guys. First of all, I've like, had it up to here with Emo guys. AND chauvenist, no less. This is the most perplexing I've encountered, but its alright. I can not think about it actually, but its kinda interesting. There's this want to try to understand and get to know more, but before it spoils all the better memories I may just ignore. Next time I'm so not standing for it though. Hmph.
tis xmas, plz stay wit me..
xx
3:16 PM
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